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Those of you who know my husband and me know that we are
eagerly awaiting a new family member: an Australian Labradoodle puppy, expected
to come home in the middle of June. It
was a long winter around here. We lost
our Standard Poodle prematurely, and the grey winter months often seemed to
reflect my emotional state. It was very,
very hard to say good-bye to an extraordinary pet. It was also difficult to acknowledge that
while Daisy was truly extraordinary, she was also a considerable
challenge. Adopted by us at fourteen
months, she came with a boatload of insecurities and bad habits. Our best efforts at rehabilitation brought
unremarkable results. Thus the appeal of
a puppy—we get another chance at raising a dog who will be an integral member
of the family and a gracious hostess
to guests. Or, as my husband puts it,
“Now we won’t have anyone to blame but ourselves.”
Do you remember the childhood practice of “do-overs?” If something didn’t go quite right, or there
was a disagreement over play protocol, a do-over was in order. A do-over was a simple strategy to get
something right. But less simple is the
powerful truth that underlies the do-over: second chances reflect who God
is—His love and mercy, and His desire for our wholeness.
God is a God of second chances; and third, and fourth…. When
the Apostle Peter asked Jesus how many times he was supposed to forgive an
offending brother and offered a generous proposal of seven times (Matthew
18:21), Jesus responded with His “seventy times seven” answer (Matthew
18:22). Since we are sinners in a sinful
world, we will need forgiveness, over and over.
As we walk in faith, we will be given the opportunity to forgive others,
over and over.
In my counseling ministry, I often suggest a do-over
strategy for adults: the “instant un-replay.”
In our interactions with one another, we will invariably experience
conflict born out of the sin and selfishness of ourselves and others. Such conflicts, while unpleasant, offer us an
opportunity to experience spiritual redemption and relational healing and
growth. Rather than running down an “I’m
right/you’re wrong” track, we can ask for an instant un-replay. We can humble ourselves and try again (and
perhaps again) to communicate and receive communication in a way that promotes
God’s work in us and through us. Of
course, an apology, when appropriate, is a great way to initiate an instant
un-replay.
Receiving God’s extra chances and offering extra chances to
others are powerful ways to experience and share the nature of God and reflect
His redemptive work. It also builds
deep, trusting, intimate relationships that are deeply satisfying. I, for one, need many chances, and I would be
delighted to offer you the same.
